Is It Sexism, Or Not?

If you're not sure if something is "sexist" or not, or biased FOR one sex or not, ~~whether the possible target is male or female, and regardless of the sex of the possible "perpetrators", ~~
switch the target person in your mind to the opposite sex, and see how the situation shifts, or if it doesn't shift.

In other words:  

If you're wondering if a person is getting treated with favoritism by a certain group because they're biased toward their sex, switch their sex in your imagination, but ONLY their sex, and keep everything else about them the same: their gestures, the way they speak, their body language, and what they say. If they were the same person, doing the same things, but the opposite sex, would the group still treat them like they were the best thing since sliced bread? Or would they reject them, or treat them like they're "weird" or "unstable"?

If you're wondering about a group of people being condescending or arrogant toward you, think about how they would treat you if you were yourself, but the opposite sex, in the exact same situation. How would they treat you? Would it be the same, or would they treat you better? Would they treat you with more respect, even though you would have exactly the same experience, knowledge, and capability as you do now, just because you were the other sex?
Watch how they treat others of each sex as well in the same situation.

If you're wondering about a community you happen to be in, or are thinking about moving to, get a good look around before committing to anything. If your son is creative and scientific,, cares about animals and others, with a pleasant, respectful demeanor, and you move to an area where the people are always trying to make boys "prove their masculinity" by acting a certain way, acting "tough", disrespecting girls and women, and shaming them for having any interests outside of a very limited set of preset parameters, he'll probably have to deal with continual childish behavior from other kids, and from adults as well, and he'll probably have a hard time making friends, and receive very little support from adults in the area, if any.
If your daughter plays guitar, loves science, is very creative, and likes to build things, she will likely also get bullied and ostracized as well, by both kids and adults. Which also means they probably won't be safe, because they'll be bully targets and no one will have their back.
Communities that force children into specific and limited gender roles don't like people (or children) who won't follow along with their agenda, so they'll often target them for bullying and/or ostracism. Since it's about control, there are consequences for refusing to be controlled. 
 
If you find that a group of people you're involved with or have met is treating people with favoritism or disrespect due to a person's sex, then you know that you're dealing with people who have gender-role and bias issues. So if you're the sex that's favored, they'll treat you better automatically, and if you're the sex that's disfavored, they'll be likely to behave disrespectfully and oppressively toward you. This will be the case for your loved ones as well, your children, siblings, parents, and your partner, as well as your friends.
Armed with this knowledge and awareness, you can choose to either use their bias issues to your advantage, or choose to tread carefully, or choose to bow out.  They're not likely to change, or to hear you if you talk about it, because they're invested in ego and belief and constantly reinforcing one another's fantasies and beliefs.
(If you notice, they'll be throwing their own kids, relatives, friends, and own selves under the bus in order to keep their status quo.)
So it's up to you to choose, stay and deal with it, or go.

Envy, Competition, Desire, Ego, and War

Envy is a common motive behind
bullying, insult, slander, libel,
sabotage, and war.

Competition for attention, credit,
popularity, status, affection,
favoritism, resources, and
business is a close runner-up.

Desire for possession and control
over a person or a group of people
is another motive.

If the human species suddenly evolved just
a little bit, these issues would no longer exist.

Self-Righteousness And NPD

Self-righteousness, elevating one's self to be "above reproach", and judging others to be inferior for various "reasons" are traits of Narcissistic disorder.

"I am naturally, categorically above those other people, therefore my thoughts and feelings are correct, right, and righteous, and in comparison to mine, theirs are flawed, invalid, nonsensical, wrong, and insignificant."

"I am physically superior to those people, and therefore supreme."

"I have more than those people have, therefore I have more power, and deserve more power."

"They have more power, control, and material wealth than I do right now, but I am the one who deserves to have power, wealth, and control over them, because I am superior to them."

Defensiveness And Power

Black-and-white thinkers often assume that if another person's statement, opinion, or point of view does not sound exactly the same as their own (even if it IS the same, but is said in a slightly different way), then they must be "against" them.

It's either "right" or "wrong",
they're either "with me" or "against me",
they either "get it" or they're "clueless",
they're either "good" (like me), or "bad" (not like me).

This black-and-white thinking, team-making, and assumption-making has been affecting humanity adversely for millennia, and the effects can be seen throughout history in war after war, oppression after oppression, horror after horror, and right now in the modern era, from global issues all the way to family problems.

Humans are just people, no matter who they are or where they're from. We're all the same species, no one has natural supremacy over anyone else. "Power" is created with the gathering of resources, weapons, territory, and other humans, not born in an individual (a statement that only upsets those who want natural power to be real, so they can have it, or so that someone they admire can have it). So when we share our points of view there is no real reason to take sides or become defensive, no one has more inherent power or authority than anyone else in the natural world, it only exists when it's believed to exist.

Religion And Male Supremacy

There actually are religious teachings and writings that specifically instruct that males are superior to females, and therefore have automatic authority over them. Obviously not the "word of God", because it directly contradicts the teachings about humility, cooperation, and respecting one another. There is no humility in subjugation, it's simply not possible, because it requires superiority.

If one sex gets to be superior to the other and have natural authority over the other, and that was actually the word of God, then that would apply to anyone and everyone regardless of their mental health state, status, wealth, or job. In other words, if males have natural authority over females, then the man down the street who watches child porn and plots retaliation against his neighbors for playing music he doesn't like has "natural authority" over all the women in the neighborhood, the female doctors at the hospital, the female state troopers, your mother, my mother, our daughters, and all of the women in the world. Natural authority is natural authority, status is status. It's either real, or it's not.
It would not be any different for a religion to create reasons for women to have entitled natural authority over all men. Would that be fair, or right? Of course not, and neither is the other way around, both are simply about ego and desire for control.

Many also claim, in the name of religion, superiority over others due to ancestry. Same thing, either it's real and absolute, if it's God's word, or it's not. Either there are actually ancestries that deserve natural authority over the others, or there are NONE, for any reason whatsoever. And since there is no such thing as "pure ancestry" with a straight line back to the first humans, and "race" is simply a matter of chromosomes that are switched on or off, it's really a silly card to play. "Races" are no more separate species than the sexes.

There also are now, and have been throughout the centuries many individuals, including Constantine, who specifically chose/choose certain writings, and dispensed of others, and purposely made sweeping decrees and publications, and built with their ample resources very large organizations in order to justify their power, and keep themselves, their descendants, and their sex in power.

Humility and subjugation do not exist in the same place, ever.
One can not be humble and superior at the same time.
Humility, cooperation, and respect, however, all go hand in hand.

The Lion And The Field Mouse

The Lion And The Field Mouse
by Mimi Black


A field mouse lives in a hole in the lions' cage
at the zoo. The only food and water she gets is what
she can glean from the lion’s daily rations, and from
what she can find outside the cage, where she must
avoid being caught and killed by humans and other
predators such as birds and roaming cats.
She learned to avoid cheese-baited traps when
the end of her tail was cut off by one of them
snapping down on her when she tried to gather the
cheese. She has lived in the hole in the lions' cage
for three years, and has successfully raised babies,
in spite of the obstacles she must face every day.
The lions try to catch her when they see
her, but so far have not been successful.
The lions are fed and given water, health checks,
attention and affection by the zookeepers;
the mouse only gets chased with a broom.
Everyone is careful about how they treat the lions
because of their teeth, claws, and bad temper,
but no one is careful about how they treat the mouse,
because they don’t fear her. 
No one protects her, and unlike the lions,
she is usually alone, with no one to help her.  

Which is tougher, the lion or the mouse?

Post by Reality Is Beautiful.